CHAPTER 23

This dialogue is deep into the intervention coming after 8 different people including David’s 3 children have expressed their feelings regarding his behavior and drinking

But here Susan has just revealed to David that she was called by a begruged ex-employee – a 23 years old secretary – who told Susan that she had sex with David – David's response was - “Well - we really didn’t have sex, Susan . . . – (because the secretary had forced herself on him after a company party when David was really drunk)

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Susan jumped up and reacted furiously – “What do you mean you didn’t have sex? - you mean like Bill Clinton “I didn’t have sex with that woman” . . . you didn’t have sex? – you didn’t have sex? – – now yelling at him - "you didn’t have sex! Are you insane David? What the hell do you think you were doing when she stuck your cock in her mouth and sucked it - you were having sex - and in case you forgot David your cock belongs to me – that’s my cock she had in her mouth – I don’t know if I can ever touch you again or how long it is going to take IF EVER for me to see your cock and not have some images of little miss air head’s mouth sucking your cock – I am so angry with you that you would violate our intimate space and be so unconscious and insensitive to think it doesn’t matter to me – I hate you for being so drunk you couldn’t tell the difference – you ripped me off from a space of dearest loving and caring for you that I treasured and enjoyed giving to you so very much - your cock has been my friend for over 19 years – I know every part of it – probably better than you do - I know what you like and how to make you feel turned on - and you gave that up for what – for you to get off - to get some relief from your “STRESS” – FUCK your stress David – you think you had stress then you wait - over these next months and maybe years – your act of NO SEX will cause you so much more pain, regret and suffering that you will wish with all of your might you could have that moment back and choose to have honored me and our vows – but you know what David - you can’t take it back– you can never get what we had back - you gave away a part of me, that part of us – I don’t think I can ever forgive you – I really don’t – ASSHOLE – FUCKING ASSHOLE”

Susan aggressively approaching him – looking him in the eye and then slapped him with all of her strength - knocking him out of his chair – Richard watched to see if David would attempt to defend himself in any way prepared to step in – but David just took the slap and allowed the pain of his face to be felt deeply – he hung his head - shacking it slightly as if to say - I understand and I deserved that - and he couldn’t look at Susan - he couldn’t feel the impact of the moment enough to cry – he was too much in shock with everything that was happening to his life – he had never heard Susan rebuke him or anyone like that – he felt how he had lost Susan’s trust - and realized that her trustin him was something he had teken for granted - that it would always be there - and he understood her trust was very dear to him and he had forgotten how she felt so tenderly about his body and their intimacy and the depth of her feelings of finding their moments together which was a safe resort for her.

Susan said “you didn’t have sex.” Laughing sardonically – “God damn it David.” – she turned and walked away putting her head in her hands briefly then throwing back her head, stomping her foot very hard with each yell of - FUCK! . . . FUCK!. . . FUUUCK! –

She turned and fell down on the couch - half prostrating herself - - - like a teenager would on her bed; feeling into a broken heart, burying her head in her folded arms and began loud, long and hard weeping sounds - becoming uncontrollable.

No one moved - the feeling of unreconcialble grief was clearly felt - and the messages of responsability were clear.

“Susan, I’m . . . I'm really sorry . . . I never. . .

Susan sat up and looked at him “You’re sorry – your sorry David – you think that is going to fix this – you think that all you have to do is say I’m sorry Susan and I’ll forgive you - or say – (sarcastically - mocking him) Oh, honey it’s alright . . . that your fucking secretary stuck your cock in her mouth – but it’s ok – just don’t do it again – and now we’re back to trusting each other. – get real David - you fucking betrayed me you broke our vows – you asshole."

David began – “Susan geez, you never swear – I …”

"Right, David I never do swear do I?- that’s right – And why is that? Because I told your years ago I did not want swear anymore – but ooops I forgot - I'm sorry. – no David, actually I didn’t forget – I’m swearing on purpose, you idiot, because you have offended me so much - you have violated me so much - you have hurt me so much - I frankly am not attempting to be a good girl in this moment - what I learned from Alanon and talking with thoses bitches - is I’m letting out all of the rage I feel for you because of what your behaviors and your drinking has done to our lives - my life and our childrens lives – because if I held these feelings inside David - I’d probably take a heavy object and beat you to death with it - I sware to you – Oh and by the way – in case you don’t know - I have never cheated on you either – Why? Because I gave you my word and made a vow I would never do that."

No one spoke – David was numb and his thoughts were blank – Richard too, was profoundly impacted by the moment - and Ron was sitting back fully understanding this is exactly what an intervention should do to the participants – each one is best served by full uncompromising communication - especially in this moment of potential for deep expression - allowing the expression for the pain, the grief, the sorrow and damage that abuse of any kind can inflict on couples, their children and friends - which sometimes permanently and potentially irreparably altering all of their relationships.

After a few moments Susan got up and said calmly – "That’s it – I’m done here – I can’t do this marriage any more – I want out of the relationship David - and I never want you to be in my house again – get out - get out now – Richard . . get him out of here - now Richard."

Richard got up and approached Susan and holding out his hands – and as she took them and looking in her eyes he said calmly and slowly– “Susan – I understand - I know how upset you are – but I don’t’ feel you should make such a permanent decision while you are feeling this way."

Ron spoke up and said – “Yes, Susan - Richard’s right – these feelings you are having are very normal for you right now - they are very healthy - and I want to praise you for the courage it took to let them all out - but you need time to process all of the many details and the impacts this time is having for you and for everyone - especially the effect which making such a choice right now would have on everyone while you are this upset. Here’s what I’d recommend – Allow Richard and I to finish up with David – I have already told you the procedures we will follow to complete this phase of the intervention – so please Susan if you could stick with the plan and leave, I assure you in a few hours when David is gone – either to the treatment center or out of the house and you and I and Richard and Stacy can talk with you – you will feel much better – so please just go ahead now – Stacy is in the car waiting.”

Susan – now was in a state of drained exhaustion and was sitting on the couch staring off with a blank look on her face – broke the silence – “Sure – fine – ok” getting up slowly, walked to the front door, opening it calmly, her arms dropping to her side – stood for a moment and then walked out not closing the door.